Deep end

I eat hardship for breakfast and then stress for dinner,
Nothing good happens whether you're a saint or sinner.
I used to find any form of inspiration
But nowadays my energy is beyond expiration.
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My life only gets harder everyday
I'm not encouraged by what other people say.
They don't know anything, they lack so much wisdom
They even live lives far from God's Kingdom.
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I want to be away from all idiocy and responsibility.
I just want to indulge in everything that makes me happy.
Instead I'm around people and situations that make me sad or mad.
My mind corrupts and I think of doing evil and bad.
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Daily, I finish my responsibilities in a hurry
Because I despise wasting my precious time and money
Especially on things that really won't benefit my happiness.
Really I know, life resulted my deep selfishness.
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Sometimes I think it's such a shame, what I've become.
It's not so different to what I would classify as dumb.
Everyday. I always thought that I would be better off dead.
But God keeps saving me from going to the deep end.
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Copyright Star Ashley Cruz
Dec. 24 2017