On the edge

I think I already have zero drive,
I no longer enjoy being alive.
Everyday I don't feel or see my future
I have no time or money for endless pleasure.
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People who don't know God are drowning in luxury,
Yet the opposite is what's happening to me.
Inconvenience, acrimony and frustration,
I hope this won't lead me to depression.
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My mind is always on the edge,
Not to kill anybody is my pledge.
But I'm so tired of pretending to be happy,
It makes me want to stab everybody.
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I know I'm blessed but I still feel half empty,
For good things are less and the bad is plenty.
Don't leave me God, in my time of need,
In my prayers I need you to heed.
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Copyright Star Ashley Cruz
August 24 2017