Misanthrope's rope

The world is moving too fast, I got left behind.

I’m all alone in this world is what I find.

I’ve never felt so small deep inside.

I’d feel embarrassed or ashamed to confide.

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Adjusting my standards just to make ends meet.

Only receiving the bare minimum in a life, I can’t cheat.

Maybe I deserve this cause I’m a self-absorbed, arrogant bitch.

No matter how hard I toil away, I don’t get rich.

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It’s not like a simple life looks bad to me.

Just peer into my mind and heart, you will see.

In life, I just want something mine, stable and secured.

Instead, I get a family I didn’t create where I’m constantly tortured.

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Now I’m the man of the house because our life didn’t give me a choice.

Being left alone and resting at times are my only chance to taste simple joys.

Witnessing and/or experiencing toxicity from relatives and even family.

And people still dare to wonder why I practice and engage in misanthropy.

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Are my heart’s desires really hard to please?

If I can’t have them, I wish to cease.

Lord, help me see beyond this scope of darkness and give me hope.

I think I’m losing my mind; I’m nearing the end of my rope.

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Copyright

Star Ashley Cruz

Feb. 4 2023